LOVE IN A CONSOL BOTTLE

 For the ladies. Ever wondered how it felt to have a menstrual cycle after a miscarriage. Don't wonder! It is painful, uncomfortable and almost messy. My poor bedding! I am no expert even if losing my babies. However this period is definitely painful and stressful. Almost like in high school when you watched your uniform or asked your friend to check if you had messed. The body and it's strange way of activating and making you feel almost weird. Cramps and strong coffee. That's my history and my go to. At 16 years old onwards I suffered with PCOS. Hair on the chin and missed periods. Mood swings and profuse perspiring. That has been cycles and years of struggle. Losing my teeth and almost my hair. I did not know my body was stressed out. Different circumstances and scenarios that could have been rectified if I was not that stubborn. When I met JP about 5 years ago things changed. Because of his gentle nature with me and almost stress free marriage my body settled and the pe...

 Filling a void. Just like a custard pie filling. Today we judged a lady that was clearly uncomfortably overweight. From her chin to her ankles she just looked uncomfortable and it got me thinking. At 144kgs some time back I had emotionally ate myself into diabetes. I looked pregnant and highly uncomfortable. I ate because I tried to fill a void that was missing in my life. Living at the time with a narcissist I contemplated dealing with it through emotional eating. From chocolate bars to the very last morsel on my plate, dished full of carbs and I just kept eating until my clothes barely fit. From the time I woke to the time I slumbered snacking on everything. It was at the lowest point of my life when I realized one day that I could not get off the bed and perspiring profusely, rolled off there and I never looked back. Not that weight at least. I made a point to change. To be more diligent in my choices and my health. To be alive in me and block negative energy and abuse I tolera...

Five days of festivities and for interest sake I read up on what Diwali entails. Each time I read it was visit friends and family with gifts. Celebrate with friends and family. Light fire works, pray for good fortune and the new year. This was yet a quiet lonely day with nothing but a few shopping items and fruits put before our Lord. Two people wished me for this day and well we ate and now nothing more to celebrate. No family to help you acknowledge the day and no friends to acknowledge my love of this festival and great occasion. As I lit a sparkler to show Lana, she was interested but of course she could not bite it and so moved on. You know many want Christmas wishes and New Year wishes for their events and festivities however it would be or never is reciprocated no matter which religion you walk. Again I say this has been one hell of a lesson for me and will never be forgotten. I had gotten birfi biscuits and almond fingers. Birfi and ladoo balls. Mebos and gauva flakes. Chocolat...

 The nine pentacles keep coming up in the deck for a few days. I suppose it wants to show up for us, over and over again for a reason, so let me embrace this card and get the message out there. It is a card of spiritual and material satisfaction. Milestones reached and celebrated. Successful harvest. Here I can say that have you planted something, you had totally forgotten. Maybe passed an exam you were not depending on that you would? Maybe this fear of investing in something that is surely to come and show up for you when you least expect it. Put a couch on higher purchase and open your eyes and it is now fully paid? That's always a good feeling. Even though for me higher purchase, is risky and scary. The card of personal achievement. In my current situation, this is evident in my last post, that I finally completed the file in Communication. It has been completed and maybe I should celebrate the milestone. You always have something to set your goals towards and then to achieve t...

 What a moment. I am studying, and yes I am to become a teacher in South Africa to earn my SACE certificate and then on to PGCE for a full-on teacher diploma. With great joy, I say that my father-in-law has been so kind to sponsor me through his consultancy and for me to Educate myself further. The love of studying, only now to make the time. It has always been a dream of mine to successfully fulfill my destiny as a teacher and getting the Diploma will be a lifelong dream of mine. In saying that, even though much to my dislike of juggling a job and time with my little family, I find myself finishing off files that should have been done a long time ago. Yes, I have my certificate in Teaching, however, the Diploma and moving forward are a must, especially for the dreams of teaching overseas. I am almost halfway and I have to make a concerted effort to take my days off, seriously for these files alone. It is never too late my stepdad would say, and yes shift work and home life are alw...

Twin flames came out of the Love Oracle Deck today. And Soulmate cards said time will tell. Twin flames. The mirror image of your next and eternal bestie. What you say, they think. How you feel they feel. Telepathic talk sounds like self talk? It's not crazy or delulu. Its a real fact. Silence once you know who they are? They are plotting. Scheming how to stay. After they make love, they better have something good to entice you to stay. I guess the next card has come at the precise moment. Time will tell. Ah, the infamous time bomb. Waiting for a text or a kiss or a visit. Anticipating the finale and yet time keeps going. It is a genuine feeling to feel disappointment in each aspect of a twin flame and time is not a healer. Time has no reversal button. You cannot reverse what you didn't do when you had the moment. I believe twin flames are rare but the stepping stones to getting them near you is tormenting. False twin flames also appear like a firework for his 5 seconds of fame...

Here I am in my newly dug up garden and dug again compliments of Lana this morning where my Namaqualand daisies are not even a trace on the ground but we pursue a meditation place. Ice cold lime water and the sun almost baking my skin. I chose a meditation spot today. Just the garden and my thoughts. Of course my puppy along side me as always. I did a bit of reading where I read maybe 3 books a few pages each of each book and strangely they all had the same message about suffering. Life's ever lasting suffering and attachment. I have a knack of reading deeply spiritual books and so the break in between is to read other books to keep my mind actively alert on the message. But the synchronicity in each book surprised me greatly. I then did an online video for a job and let that go. And now just the peace within me of actively waiting for the electricity to be fixed once again. Downtime was needed and so my wifi took a break and so did I. I have 1 million things to do for Diwali but I...

 Disappointment comes in small packages. Lately, I have had many people disappointment the fuck out of me. I guess I know who is in my circle. Who is in my tribe, and sadly it is barely on one hand. You know I have to remember that people are not me. Yesterday, I experienced jealousy from someone I barely know, she is actually my thrift store go-to. Gosh, that was ugly. My dog growled at her not to stop in the car. I trust Lana trust me. Then my so-called friend, had to come to me to see if she could look after Lana, while I was at work for some time and she too disappointed me and I told her I had a 10am appointment. Guess I had to cancel that. My mother, not once did she come near me after I lost her grandchild, my beautiful daughter. (miscarried another soul). Apparently, daughters should visit their mothers. (I miss my gran!) My sister, my relationship with my nephews. Everyone cut the ropes, or did I? I will always show up for people, and I would never hesitate to help others ...

 The hermit card has arrived. This is a soul searching almost alone and down time contemplation for lazy afternoons or gardening days. Much as I did yesterday, I stayed indoors and refused to point blank to see people, or shop or spend money. Lana and I gardened most of the day, and by the end of it, I had sore muscles and an insatiable appetite for good food. The hermit is resetting almost your life again, and meditatively you do something that you love, by activating the answers, getting it all out there, and resonating with the fate of the outcome. Much to my delight, my garden looks summer-ready, maybe Diwali-ready too. I had a good time with my Lana banana and she mostly ate all the twigs in the compost and dug up her own side of the garden, but she got the message. It was garden day. Being alone is not my strongest point, but when I need to creep back into my shell and figure out a few things, I have no problem doing it. I am not a Hermit, but I do enjoy the finer things in t...

 I'm trying subliminals again. They are a wonder for your subconscious mind. The subject line, for example, opens up channels, obviously, I believe. Like "make a billion dollars overnight," the subject brings your mind to a state of consciousness and out of 3D. It is amazing, almost meditative. "get the job" is like demand and command to your subconscious mind. It works. Magic! So I tried a few and I got some really cool results, however, I am not sure which worked and which didn't for the desired outcome, not person mind you. Some absolutely resonate with you, and others are just a noise. I think the one that makes the most annoying noise, is opening channels you have not tapped into yet. Amazing, yet scary at the same time. I have the subliminal makers that I follow faithfully and stick to what they do because it once worked. And continuously shows up for me even though some are forced and others are just calm and subtle. So how do you choose your subs? We...

Ever dream of someone that it is so real you not sure if you are there or if you are dreaming. And after all is said and done and it worked out in your favour you wake up and cry because the subconscious saw something reality yearns for? Oh my goodness these dreams I am having are so real lately and it is as though I am playing out my vision in my head that the true world is the subconscious one. That is the point of manifestation right? To live in the altered state of mind. The end result and the manifested outcome. I was always good at dreaming and interpreting the dream, however when someone blows hot and cold in your life you never know what is true and what is not. What you are yearning for and what is beckoning for your attention. This dream made reality a dull moment. It was as though I was caught creating a dream into reality. Faced with so much on my plate. Maybe it is all the subliminals I have been listening to. The dream felt good. It felt amazing and truly a manifested des...

Ah the 10 of pentacles. Such a delightful card. A round of success and a pinch of love gathered by a community. At a fast pace. Coming hard and heavy. I believe that success is everywhere and with that your home and life and love should all be what you have put out there and desire more so. The love of family and the true beauty of children and animals around you for as long as you can. I may not have been blessed with children but I have the blessing of life with JP and Lana. And that's my success. To be around these two beautiful souls gives me so much hope and love. It can be trying at times but I wouldn't want to grow with anyone else. My sons and daughters up there are watching us and waiting for us to return. But for now we gather our love in a basket and enjoy the blessings life has to give.  How honored am I to share this life with them. Until we pick a card like this again. G xxx

So here I am trying to find ideas to pack boxes for the festival of lights. It's Diwali and because we serve the true essence of the path lit, we embrace Diwali. I want these boxes to look cute as they will go to my manager at work and the other execs. Packing sweet boxes in a diabetic home can be challenging. I am highly creative, and so the art of celebrating my talent in a box is worth every penny. Budget friendly though. Biscuits are ordered. It's the sweet meats and treats plus the light in a box that I need done. And to get the boxes. I found inspiration everywhere but now to find time to go and source it and pay for it. I overthink things a lot of the time, but this has to be elegant. Especially because more so the perfection in my art but also the reason I should not forget. Should I do boxes or bags? Should I find the cutest gifts or be simple with it. Will they understand the effort and gifts if I give them? Will they use the tea light to meditate and embrace their in...

 The process of something coming into existence and developing. It's called Germination. As I was driving to work I came across a piece of grass in the middle of the highway. It was a big piece and must have fallen off a lorry. As I saw it in its vibrant colour and fresh soil I thought about something rather significant to my current situation. What would happen to that grass? It was placed there as many choices it can thrive and wait for the wind to blow it to the side and it can either thrive or die. With the cars strong winds and 120kmph it could blow to the side of the road. Here we can just assume that it could be connected with all the other grass on the side of the road or alternatively it could dry up and would thrive in the environment it has been dropped or placed in. Environmentally plants need water 💦 in this case if it has not been watered, it will wilt and dry up. Roots will end up rotting. This is exactly where I find myself in this position. I am not watered by the...

 The two of wands. What a card especially at a time when the world awaits our adventures. It refers to the future planning and new opportunities. As I shuffled the deck I anticipated another card and did a reshuffle and she still came out. What opportunities are waiting to be explored by you. How, in two minds a decision is to be made and are you up for the way forward? As we journey on, it would be either left or right at a crossroad bound for the decision we choose. I would say choose carefully and take out any outside noise that might interfere with your decision. Opinions come freely these days so listen to your inner voice. You know that one that does not lead you astray. Intuitively be ready for the journey and pack a bag. Until we decide, G xxx

 The feeling of sitting in a plane and the run way seems distant as the wheels lure you to almost a sense of freedom and airborne. The engines roar up and you can almost smell the fuel, watching the sunrise as you fly over the UAE. Majestic! Yes of course economy class has you folded like a pretzel and dipped like a chip. But the ever sound of roaring engines and the sound of beef or chicken has you elevated into a well worth break or in our case a change of scenery, a place like home. A few pieces of gum for the ears and a journey planned and you are off. I am a little nervous to pack our bags. We are leaving behind so much. Disappointment, tears, unborn babies too beautiful for earth, and the love of a country that seemed to have given us nothing but dry taps and candlelit dinners. A change of scenery is imminent and necessary. The jetplane will take us to our new home. They will fly my Lana, JP and I to a destination and believe me when I say we have precious cargo. KLM pilots w...

Being lifted spiritually comes with its perks and downfalls. Knowing energy givers and energy takers gives the perks of who to connect with and who to step back from. It's the source of the vibrations given off by the local crowd, the environment and its fatalities. Guarding yourself and surrounding yourself with a blue bubble and protecting yourselves from energy thieves is common if you know how. Grounding yourself through the roots of evergreens so you don't over compensate for total disregard of shallow spiritual darkness and only an hour to get ready for work. That's just the morning routine. 😂 Then there is the cover up for the day, the cars to be blessed, and the roads to be clear and safe. The coffee not to spill and the tyre's to trek you to the place of work. That's the next cover up all in white light. Getting to work is the song to boost your spirit, immense bass and feeling of freedom before you land. Then there is the prayer of smooth thoughtful words...

 I'm sorry, Forgive me. Thank you. I love you Hoponopo, the true essence of desire and manifestation. I don't know how it gets to work, but I can tell you what it is, creating everything and responsibility for your own life. The Mantra holds such great significance on all levels. Hugging a continent or an island is where I found myself. Tell this beautiful country that I am sorry (because I was naive) Forgive me, because I did not respect the nature of their culture and found my own, Thank you because they housed me when I should have been back in South Africa, and that I love you, to show my ever affection for this beloved island, Ireland. My husband, the South African Irish, and I have decided, with Lana of course, to trek to the wonders of this beloved Green adventure. The four-leaf clover deeply embedded in our plans, and the desire to have nothing more than a Jameson in a free concert in the park. Immigration. Leaving all we know, for something we are about to embark on th...

 Today's tarot card is the 6 of Cups. This card brings back healing of deep childhood memories, nostalgia, and healing of emotions or feelings. It is also the give-and-take card from someone with deep feelings for you. It could also mean you are in a time warp and longing for a simpler time.  For the old souls who long or yearn for a different way of life, I am one of them. This card is a reminder of how times have changed and how life has evolved. I was always into the old English style of the top hats and chariots. The wooded flame to warm your bath water, and the jug in the bowl. Now I have a deep fascination with the jug in the bowl. I have no idea, but all my life, I have longed for this to be in my house, and it is so outdated and very old school.  When we were in Kimberley, South Africa, I had gone to the made-up houses that were brought from England to South Africa. It had the effect of what I almost regress or remember and it was a familiar feeling. The wooded fl...

Ever had that feeling that your company that you loved and had so much compassion for has created spears in your lungs that your last breath is your first through the doors everyday. Never know what to expect when transparency is the order of the day. Never know who is sneaking around to hide from you with no eye contact. Evident how the big boys have nothing more to give or to tell you. Sick to your stomach that you have nothing left to give but keep fighting another day. No respect from your staff and definitely no instructions followed with massive excuses. Hardly get to eat because you are to afraid that you might be a victim to their changes and choices. You can feel the tension when they greet or when they trying to be connected but people management is out the door. Handling your staff number and not you as an individual. People are judging. And you can feel that you are the headline news. Caniving and deceitful. Plan of action in place to the next stage of my career. To the nex...

 Since the last update in 2022, I have changed this bucket list and fulfilled so much more. I realised that my writing skills have shocked me, and I choose to keep the old posts, as it reminds me just how much I have grown as a person. The last blog, I wrote that I drove my jaguar, my dream car. I had to do it, and the potential that car has, was amazing. Moving two years, my did we begin to tick the boxes. And it was amazing and still is. In the last couple of months we have been rather local, to this wonderful flea market called Busstop 7 Open Air Market in Mooikloof. It was a great drive. They have so many stalls and entertainment. I must say as a mixed race couple, we were accepted by many and many not. However I chose to support local anyway. We went to the Nachos and Avocado stall and had mixed berry smoothies. The nachos were pretty dry, but the Avocado made it for us. I love guacamole. We then went through different stalls and I found the essential oils I wanted. Much to my...

 Queen of Cups stepped up this morning and what a card, it has been showing up for quite sometime, and now for you as the collective I give you this. Intuitively you are healing your heart from something drastic and the more you are healing the better the heart is beating! Queen of cups is highly intune with emotional intelligence, love and compassion. This is always such an energy attraction. You can help all those that need to be guided and lifted and that accept the gift of intuitiveness that enlightens your path as well as theirs. Queen of cups is the most intuitive, almost dreamlike state and one of the most intuitive cards in the connection pack. This is a sign that you have been healing from anything in 2024 that perhaps has taken you to a different story, a different chapter or a painful ending. I personally love this card, as it reminds me of the power and strength I have throughout our journey that sometimes we have to weather great storms, but come out exceedingly victor...

 Detachment is important to release from suffering. Suffering is attachment. My Master Buddha has taught me this. I have released so much after this life lesson. As a result everything I manifested has now opened a new door of attraction. It's beautiful. I have had more attention in one day than I have had in almost all year. Here is the trick to today's amazing adventure I had a repetitive affirmation. Detachment Gill. Every thought controlled and each feeling emotionally released immediately. To the loo, Detachment Gill. To the coffee machine. Detachment Gill. I cut everything. I detached from intention. Gave my wish list to the starry skies and detached. It's a common reminder minute by minute. And it's working. You see, seeing the mirror image of attaching yourself to good or bad is a reciprocation  of your energy of what you feel for the object, the person or situation. Simply release the desire and watch it appear. It is such a good way to feel free again. To be p...

 Acquaintances are easy to come by. So many want the entitlement of best friend or friends. I am here for you is the words I hear lately. Many have crossed my path, for a season, reason or lifetime. Can I say a lifetime? I will never know until my journey has been lifted to the Nirvana. Right now, I look around through some really bad blows to my health, my husband's health and so forth and I think who has  lived up to the expectation of I am here for you! My husband, is a definite. Let us define what is I am here for you. Where is here? There? I am not sure. I can't begin to express my disgust for those words. Here, is right here, passing me the tissues and crying with me. That is here for you. Not a message, that is emotionless to me. Not a kiss on a virtual plane, or a telepathic hug. Right here for you, means at this moment I have taken time out of my day, and made it about you. You know, I know not everyone is about that, and I am probably so in tune with others emotions ...

 For the twin flames who have experienced no contact and yet the most amazing relationship ever, I give you two cards, that might give you a glimpse of hope, or you might think this might not be for you. If it resonates, go with it. If not, I sincerely hope you get the messages they are sending you.  The Soul Mate Tribe card says: Are you thinking about me? Is that even a question. Twin flames tend to not switch off with the person they admire the most. You could be thinking about them in many ways, and hoping for the dreams to be a reality, even with no words and no actions. The next card from Love Oracle Deck says: Heart with a key. Welcoming love, meeting the one, open your heart. Getting together. Perfect. This is a clear indication that your perfection, even how imperfect lies with the twin, soul, or karmic for now and gives you great meaning to giving your key to your person. I guess that is what it is all about. Sharing your key with the one you want to have. Make it pr...

 Today's fix is two aces. Ace of Wands and Ace of Pentacles. Great cards you guys! It is the great manifestation of desires, the art of getting whatever you desire as the end result. New ventures, new results, and planting seeds to generate greater foresight later on. In the gambling world, the Ace holds the key to great gambling. It could be a 1 or an 11. Especially if you are playing blackjack. Before we move on do you see that 111 has appeared in this. It is the manifestation number and new beginnings, leadership, and spirituality.  Life is full of risks and challenges, but when you get good news and important information that can amplify your hope in things longed for, you have a chance to submit to the ultimate desire and detach from the things that once held you captive to your world. My energy is my creative side and my willingness to move forward creatively and without hesitation. It is the rainbows and carnivals of life. It is the little moments and the big lessons. I...

 Ever know when it is time to move on in a workplace? Even if you do not have another offer lined up. Well I have the cutest CEO with so much love in his heart. But his people have failed his people. I have realized that you can give your last to a company, blood sweat and onions and in return you are reprimanded like a school child for misbehaving. No one let's you know when you doing the right thing or when you bringing your brains to the table. No one dare. Toxic environments, betrayed and common jealousy are to say the least I have experienced in this shallow environment and getting out to find myself and my life is probably the turning point that I crave. The teaching of young kids and the ability to make a difference in others lives to fulfill my destiny in the world and my journey. That is my creativity that has been stamped on and excluded in this company and trust me I have so much to give. However maybe my teaching and training should be my main goal. The kids of the worl...

Embracing My Shaman Past and the Power Within There’s no doubt in my mind that I was brought back from my shaman's past life. I haven’t delved too deeply into it, but during my first few Reiki lessons, we had to experience regression. Unbeknownst to me, I was taken to a time when I was part of a tribe, one that failed its people. I was the Shaman’s wife, and the Chief and I had everything—until we lost it all. Captured by a burning village, our people were destroyed. It was incredible, almost surreal, to visit that past. And to this day, I believe a crow follows me—yes, it does. A magnificent being, sometimes appearing in twos, always watching. A few days ago, I did a meditation, and it was revealed that I have the power to ignite any force because I am gifted in ways I may not fully understand. I’ve always known there’s something powerful within me. I remember a fun story from years ago, on a trip to Cape Town. I was always the curious one, the clown, the one who loved to experime...

Embracing Growth and Renewal in Love Today's cards were the 2 of Cups and 8 of Swords —a powerful combination with deep meaning. The 2 of Cups brings great romance, love, and the union of kindred spirits. It’s a beautiful reminder of the soul-deep connection we share with others, the bond that goes beyond the surface. On the flip side, the 8 of Swords is a wake-up call, an eye-opener that unveils truths we may have been avoiding. Perhaps it's an old story or a mindset that has kept us trapped in limiting beliefs. When these two cards come together, the message is clear: it’s time for a renewal of love, especially when romantic feelings have grown stagnant. The 2 of Cups and 8 of Swords together are a symbol of growth—a reminder that love needs new energy, new vigor, and a fresh perspective. It’s a nudge to let go of what’s no longer serving your relationship, especially the baggage or old wounds that might be holding you both back. Kindred spirits, as the 2 of Cups sugges...

 Dare I say I am over 40. It has been exhausting to say the least but one thing about my genes it has its perks. Not a wrinkle in view. Older yes but flawless skin. As I suffer with PCOS hair growth on the chin is exhausting. I go and laser every month and so far I am impressed. My chin is clear and beautiful. So my routine is as follows come winter or summer the trick is my cold tap. Cold water get the pores looking fresher and more toned. I wash my face off and use a daily scrub with dead sea minerals. I then massage and rinse of thoroughly. I then use a micellar water from Garnier with vitamin C extract and use a cotton disc for all the cleansing around the neck at the back and behind the ears. Trust me it is so refreshing. Then I use Nivea aftersun UV protection. This is my moisturizer. And we off. I use very light to no make up and bling my eyes with eyeliner and mascara. I never thought this was me. But I do it daily. At night I use my Lana Line castor oil mix with hemp for t...

 I was never one to blow dry my hair all the years. I had curly curls and a wild and exhausting look. Thick hair. My sister always did it until I realised I had to do it myself. My gran would oil and treat our hair, roll out and sit in the sun. I cut my hair recently to a pixie cut and needed my natural curls back and I wanted the relaxer to go. But the effort comes with great strain. Pulling out all the conditioner and heat resistant oils to keep this beautiful hair in its place. It took me a long time to embrace it. I do not wrap my hair at night and in the morning well I look like Don King. And the process starts all over again. The upside is that after a gym session wash and go is easier, less effort to wash or style. Aunt Jackie fix my hair is my go to, along with Cantu Leave in conditioner. Black Jamaican Castor oil for the down days and Extra Shine Avon shampoo. Gliss Million conditioner or the Intensive therapy conditioner. I have it all. Bone Strait for the blow dry if and...

 I have pulled the 10 of cups as your daily dose of reading today. As I shuffled the tarot, I said for the world. Embrace this card. Its a keeper. Romance on the way, family and bliss with a romantic partner. Happiness and rainbows and coco pops for the sugared up people of the world. This partner has enlightened your next journey and believe that Christmas will be your chance to end your loneliness, feel wanted and gifts under the tree for you this year. For those that are expecting, the card shows a girl. Alternatively you will get a new puppy and a new partner. Ignite those flames and don't hold back. For once someone is stepping up to the plate for you. They are not afraid to show you to the world. You are always a giver this time you are getting back. Take the chance. They are worth it.  Until the next good news. G xxx

 The new words been thrown around that I have recognised lately are flight freeze and fright, breadcrumbing, gaslighting ect.  The one I am interested in is breadcrumbing. I always used to say that I am the whole loaf. It makes sense right now why. Breadcrumbing can be defined as someone who gives you a morsel of where you find yourself stringing along. Following the breadcrumbs, Hansel and Gretel type lead. Blowing hot and then cold. Being a puppy to risking challenges all for the crumbs of what a person can offer you. Its quite deafening to realise that a Mr Darcy type scenario has faded over time. That the old English courting and being a gentleman has escaped the evolution. Chivalry is dead. Has been for some time where woman choose their fathers roles and claim their manhood. It could be a spiritual journey or experience. However saying this there is nothing wrong with choosing your prefered gender but the woman batting for the other team has more chivalry than a very str...

 Did you ever imagine being loved and admired to ecstasy that the person you are in love with you cry for? Is this even possible for someone who is married but burns for someone they love and well cannot have. Every thought, telepathic or in true form has had you yearn deeply and sincerely to make memories with someone who is as stubborn as a rock. And freewill has you balling your eyes out because the love is powerful and evident on both ends but the willpower to tell them or tell me is weak. Now I have fallen in love before but never to this magnitude. I feel as though I am cheating however not. He has that Je ne sais qois that tantalize my taste buds and beckons for attention. Yet he ignores me. Barely greets me. He knows I am there but his preventative measures are thicker than a government condom.😂 Will not let the slippery sucker fall off.  Well he knows who I am. I know him. We made love in the 5D world many times. Maybe 5 D is my illusion but I was blown away anyway. ...

 Customer Service has been a part of my career journey for a long time let's say almost 21 years. And in this time the tips and traits of healing a broken customer or an irate one has brought much delight to my table when the job is complete and the battle won. It is fulfilling. What bothers me is that as smooth as I pray each of my customers are at the end of the day I know that the delicacies of a true promise is for the brand you trust. When however you make a promise you can't keep and torment the customer even further, retention seems far fetched and canceling any subscription is imminent or fulfilled. Many do not do what is needed to keep the finance and brand going. You are just another invoice. Giving out the best service is Gen Z based lately. More so service has an entitlement and a race card attached on almost every ticket. Customer service third world has highly disappointed me. First world has a greater turn around time and profound way of acting quicker. Is it the...

 Tarot cards are such a form of meditation that can meet the true self to touch base and control each part of almost an emotional opening, to heal or to adjust the best versions of yourself. It may resonate with your energy or the energy that surrounds you. As I look at my tarot table I remember something that maybe I feel is more of a synthetic atmosphere and a more unpleasant journey. Over the last couple of months, I have pondered upon a very close relative of mine. Each time we visited there was fresh salt scattered all over the doors and windows when we walked in. They hesitated for me to be with them or around them at all. I asked if they wanted my Lana Line (mixes of essential oils and castor oil) that I wanted to create, to help them with some ailments. They had declined. And slowly I started seeing the bigger picture. The excuses were that there were too many Buddhas in my home, or that I had a dog and she prayed which is why she did not visit. I would send Tarot readings ...

 My Lana has a phobia for bikes, people in general especially the basket lady and kids buggies. But today we were super proud to get Lana to be social. We went to the doggie park. Yes, we did! And this time we were super proud parents. She finally got to walk a little bit further, and a little bit more, even running most of the way. She was so relaxed and calm, and I tell you even one puppy came to visit and sniff her butt! I was super proud of the meet and greet. That meant that her social skills had greatly improved. Her compliment was that her coat was so shiny, almost like a car wax. Yes, the bikes came and scared her a bit and the people surrounding her made her sit or lay, but we were good with that. She had to get used to the people and places around her. Yes, she sniffed others' feces, and maybe a little pee on a tree. However, she has made us proud and super excited for the next adventure. Once Lana gets her collar on, she thinks she is off to Dr. Jaco for an injection or ...

 So as diabetic as I am it has been now addressed that my husband has been,  well diagnosed with this silent disease. It is one of the world's most tormenting disease based on either hereditary or self made. Mine mostly through PCOS. Sugar is the addiction most need to fight off. The strong willpower not to have donuts and raisins and watch the different food and fruit you eat drives me wild. But then I thought how about create a menu and a resturant for those of us that painstakingly cook during heated summers. Yes the chef might perspire a little but sugar free bodies can enjoy the right amount of carbs calories and cola. Sugar free cola of course! What bothers me more is that this is something we need and the shops are selling the sugar free cocaine and decadent astronomical prices for the medium wage earners is a bit ridiculous. Some research and another machine read and maybe ketone need keto diet and maybe we need a cheaper option for the delicacies that are now our suga...

 Somedays I say I have a broken dog because she reminds me of my crazy self, I want to do everything at once, then the ball, then the mat, and then the hosepipe. She is helpful with her razor-sharp teeth, I know she will puncture the hose, but I let her do it anyway. Who will bring back these sweet memories that we make? We live for these moments, of hot sunny days and cool nights. When we have fun mostly with the water, that sadly runs out in Gauteng. But we stay hopeful and use sparingly I promise. To the left, and then the right. Back and forth and in circles she goes having the time of her life. I guess the love of Lana's insatiable thirst for the hose pipe, brings me to realize that even though she is not very friendly in the bathtub, she is a beast with running water and the mouth open and she goes in for the kill. Hook, line, and sinker. I love it! I live for days when her pellets are her friends, and she zooms passed me, and around me to breathe, before the next turn of eve...

 Time to say goodbye to the hustle and bustle that I busted my balls for for about almost 1 and a half years. It was not painstakingly traumatizing but it was absolutely a death warrant on my health and mental ability to captivate myself and cage myself in a box. My creativity was out the door. My honesty was jeopardized in that I had only myself to lie to in order to face this workplace everyday and leave my darling Lana everyday. Intuition told me that no matter how much I forced to be here, it was time to close the door. Close the chapter of this blessed place. It may have given us Freedom to survive and live lavishly. But I would go to a different part of my livelihood and say let me continue to study and find a  online job where teaching is fun. Teaching children and adults that want to grow and learn. Best part I won't have to commute everyday. I won't have to be face to face and be disgusted in your ability to be a hard worker while others sit back and get rewarded for ...

 If you are a music lover like I am then I suggest take a seat. I listen to different songs for different memories and well visions in the foreseeable future. I don't know I am manifesting great things through the lyrics and visions. Cleaning the floors or cooking or a song randomly in my head and I have it on autoplay. Today I found myself working and day dreaming. And it sparked with a song by Toni Braxton. How could an angel break my heart. Yes it was a naughty thought but how did it get there? How did it populate to the scene and the setting? The feeling and realness of the touch and smell. The persons words and actions. I must say it was exhilarating and infatuation to the level of feeling something manifest. I believed Neville Goddard at 2.30pm this afternoon. Feeling is everything. End result is everything.  As I keep hearing the song, I keep invisioning the form of manifestation through music. I guess that is number 1 on my Playlist. And did it take me to a semi dim li...

Surfer dude. Touched by an angel. Telepathic kisses and goodnight hugs. Astral travelling has a way of you need to be sure you going to the right address and the right soul. As stubborn as it is we can travel through the realm to a dimension some know of and some dream of. Reiki in the first touch was amazing and taught me to Astral travel due to distant healing. And so we could use it for our own benefit as a light worker but never to harm anyone. Right now I want to astro travel and I do every night. I wake up exhausted most days because I am curious to know who is where why and how. Checking on all those that I have not seen forever or who don't really want to see me. I whisper a sweet message and come back. We learnt to self protect prior to going out. Others do it unconsciously and risk harm. I do not want dark energies to find me. I wack them out one by one. I do it to heal and to sneek peak into my crush and his activities. It keeps me sane. Cover before you fly! Until next ...

 Have you ever met someone who has a roving eye? Like peek n boo type. It's evident that this guy has this condition if I may call it that. Never wants to show me what he sees looks good. Maybe shy or just respectful. But never brave enough to look and smile or acknowledge me in any sense of the word. Look back he looks away and I stare a while longer to see if he looks again. The art of pretending. It is realistic to say I have a major crush and a total heartbreak on my hands. However as married as I am he has a way of drifting me off into a celestial illusion and I am afraid I might never return. Sometimes the grass is not always greener. But it is worth it to be curious enough to imagine. His cream cable knitted jumper with his cream chino pants. I notice it all. He might be saying your green dress with your haircut and dangling earrings. Secret diary. Visionary senses alert!! I must stop this fantasy but as celestial as it is so overpowering and tremendously addictive to crave ...

 A hot day 32 degrees, and cooled down slightly I decided to get in the home gym this evening, and boy was it a good floor workout! My Lana learned to stay out of the gym room this time, as she interrupts our workout sessions daily. She lay staring at me blankly as I stepped up and down. There is nothing greater, than doing a work out with music blaring in your ears and finding time to meditate and clear your mind as you do the different sets, and the different machines. I find it peaceful, centered, and controlled. I get to see and hear things I would not on a normal day. At the end of it all meditation as I strip my gloves off and hit the shower. Answers flow, heart racing and stress partially gone. Adrenaline at its finest. I keep returning. I am surprised a 6kg dumbell through the adrenaline feels like a 1kg dream. Brave lessons and beautiful clarity. What else? Love and muscles. G xxx

 WOW! I have been blogging for a long time, and did not think that I will ever come to this, to rewrite the pages of my life in this form. But here I am. It is absolutely amazing how time has gone by and rereading my blogging, I realized that I was pretty much actively seeking justice back then, and how I have grown. Unfortunately, after my first miscarriage, I am finishing the second round of sick leave from work, with a second one I had experienced in two years. I guess I came back here to paint a true picture of the unfortunate circumstances of my fertility journey. However, I pondered on this incredible mishap and realized maybe the time and the era was just not part of who I was, and carrying a baby would not be part of the journey set out for me. I think I am ok with it. A lot has changed since I last shared my thoughts, moving companies, getting a beautiful, abandoned puppy who lights my tree up! Falling in love with my boss and so the story goes. It has been an adventure, t...