LOVE IN A CONSOL BOTTLE

Let me explain what it means to be a “rehabilitated socialite” – a term I’ve coined, because that’s how I feel. It’s been a journey, and I’ve come to terms with the fact that some things in life are harder than they should be. And let me tell you, interracial marriage is one of those things. I’ve never been more aware of people’s opinions than I am now. You can see it in their faces – the judgment, the unspoken thoughts. It’s exhausting. And honestly, it’s led me to retract from social situations altogether. I live in a complex that’s pet-friendly, which is wonderful, and I’m grateful for the peaceful little bubble I’ve built here. We have our own yard, it’s quiet, and for the most part, we’re left to ourselves. But here's the catch: we’re renting. Even though we were offered to buy the property, I’ve realized, over time, that I don’t want to invest in this place. And I think that’s when the alienation started. I’ve become extremely unfriendly, and to be honest, maybe that’s my fau...

Today, my little Lana turns one. We had asked her previous owners for her age, and all they could tell us was that she was born in February. We picked today, February 14th, to celebrate her special day, since it's known as the day of love. So here we are, wishing our sweet Lana a Happy Birthday. She’s a bit of a handful, and I don’t know how anyone could resist her playful energy. Lana’s a trigger for chaos, especially when she’s at her most mischievous. When we’re both lying in bed, she’s all over us—licking our faces, biting our hands and feet, and jumping everywhere. It’s pure joy for her, but today, her dad had just about had enough. He gave her a little tap on the behind to correct her behavior. And here’s the thing—this simple tap, which was intended to redirect her, took me back. Way back. To a time in my past, with someone who used hitting as a form of discipline. That’s something I’ve never been okay with. I was reprimanded harshly for the smallest things growing up, and i...

Sometimes, life just falls into a rhythm, and I’ve come to realize that this new routine I’ve developed over the last 13 days with my dog, Lana, has become something of a peaceful and productive flow. It starts bright and early—5:30 a.m. to be exact. If I’m being honest, I wasn’t always this disciplined, but now, between Lana and I, we’ve mastered the art of hanging out together and making the most of our mornings. Lana is first on the list. She wakes me up gently to remind me it’s time to open the door and feed her, a routine we’ve had for a long time now. Once that’s done, I find my bearings and head straight for the kettle. These days, I’ve added a bit of extra work by filling up the water from the dispenser before boiling it, but it’s become second nature. Being diabetic, I have to take my medication after eating something, so I always start my day with some fruit and peanut butter toast paired with a good cup of coffee. It’s around 6 to 6:30 a.m. when I finally sit down in my stud...

There’s something incredibly frustrating about not having access to water. It’s one of those things you take for granted until it’s not there anymore. For us, the issue isn’t just the water being turned off—it's how it’s tied to our electricity. When the power goes out, the water pressure drops, and before you know it, the taps are dry, not a drop in sight. Even when the power is on, the water remains absent. It’s annoying. So annoying, that you probably wouldn’t understand the level of frustration I feel unless you’ve been through something like this yourself. We’re now relying on bottled water for things as simple as rinsing off a pear. The 5-liter bottles? Yeah, we use those to flush the toilet. This has become our reality, and I can’t even begin to wrap my head around the state of our infrastructure. What’s going on? On a spiritual level, water has always been a symbol of cleansing for me. When water touches my skin—whether it’s the rain, a bath, or even just the act of washing...

 The lights are out at the moment, and as I sit here typing this, I'm using my phone’s hotspot while trying to keep my laptop alive and the fan going on the last few percentage points of battery. It's a bit of a challenge, but it’s in these small moments that I’ve been able to reflect. The power may be out, but the electricity of thoughts is still flowing through me. I decided to pull a tarot card today, not only for myself but for anyone who might resonate with the energy. I thought, why not pull a Hermit card , and see if I could gain some clarity and perspective. The card I pulled was Light , and I instantly felt a sense of hope. It’s as if the universe is saying, there’s light at the end of the tunnel . That reassurance was just what I needed. The next card I pulled indicated that next month looks promising —a sign of growth, change, and possibility ahead. And it’s comforting to know that even in moments of uncertainty, there’s a brighter future just around the corner. Late...

We can delve into the wonders of energy work time and time again, and every time I return to it, I am reminded of how deeply it resonates with me. Teaching is my first love, but teaching the art of energy work is truly my passion. It’s a gift I’ve been blessed with, and it fills me with such joy to share this knowledge. Through energy work, I've come to realize how much colors and their corresponding chakras can align us with the captivating world of energy around us. Now, I know what some of you might be wondering— Why am I not a trillionaire by now? After all, energy work is so powerful, so abundant, and the universe has so much to offer. Well, truth be told, I do follow oaths and rules. While the universe is limitless and ready to give to all, I understand that there’s a balance. I could, if I truly wanted to, manifest great wealth and success—maybe even trillions—but for now, I choose a different path. My focus is on guiding and protecting, sharing this passion with those who ...

 Reiki has always been a part of me. It’s something that calls to my soul, a desire to play with energies in the light, never to harm, but to heal and nurture. As I sit here, reflecting on the years I’ve spent practicing Reiki, I realize it’s been with me through much of my late 20s and 30s. The connection to energy has always been alive in me, but today, during a Reiki meditation, I felt it again—a reminder of the powerful tool I hold within. So, I thought, why not have a little fun and play with some energy balls? Colorful ones, to be exact. I began to shape them with intention, thinking about a special person, a message I hoped to receive, maybe even a job interview, or just the joy of good food and conversation. I’ve realized that I can manipulate energy in a way that aligns with my emotional well-being and the energy I wish to share with others. With just a thought, I can toss these energy balls into the universe—towards the person in my thoughts, the food I’m craving, or even...

Sometimes, you don’t realize the significance of the place you call home until you pause, gather your thoughts, and truly explore it. It’s easy to take for granted the beauty, history, and culture that shape a province or a country until a moment like today comes along. A sudden decision, a spontaneous gesture, and we were in the car, on our way to the Apartheid Museum. It was a day that brought everything into perspective. Walking through the museum was nothing short of heartbreaking. As I wandered through the exhibits, I thought about my grandparents and great-grandparents—the pain and suffering they had to endure under a system designed to oppress them. The museum vividly depicts South Africa’s painful history, showing just how far we've come. It was a sobering reminder of the injustices of apartheid and the fight our ancestors fought to get us to where we are today. As much as I sometimes think about leaving South Africa, the history and legacy embedded in this land pull me bac...

Who else loves pineapple on their pizza? I’m definitely in the camp that says, "Yes, please!" For a chilled Friday night, nothing beats a homemade pizza paired with ice cream on a stick for dessert. It's the simple joys, right? Buying store-bought pizza these days can really add up, so I decided to take matters into my own hands. With a bit of confidence in my chef skills, I made my own pizza dough and whipped up the toppings. It was surprisingly effortless considering the time I had on my hands. Honestly, there’s something about the smell of freshly made dough that sets the tone for a relaxing evening. And let's talk about that first bite! Homemade pizza has a distinct flavor compared to store-bought or takeout. It’s less greasy, and the best part? You know exactly what’s going into it. No mystery ingredients, just pure deliciousness.  Houdini (a.k.a. my partner) came home to find the pizza ready and polished off a few slices without hesitation. I’d say the mission w...

  Dear Inner Child, Gillian Robyn, Do you remember when you dreamed of having a swimming pool in your front yard, spent afternoons cooking potato peels with Ma, or enjoyed an ice lollipop while watching your favorite wrestling matches on TV? Or those quiet Friday afternoons when you’d unwind with a Chinese movie? You always found comfort in the small things, didn’t you? The simple pleasures of childhood, when joy was found in moments that seemed so insignificant to the world, yet meant the world to you. You can still feel the sting of when you’d hurt and wish that your mother understood your emotional state of mind. You ran to your gran for comfort and love. It was always comforting to know that, even in those lonely moments, there was always someone who truly understood you. Do you remember that? The way you felt when someone saw your heart and made everything feel okay? You discovered music at such a young age, and it became your lifeline, didn’t it? The music that you danced to ...

The process of landing an interview these days feels a bit like preparing for an investigation—endless paperwork, references, and the scramble to dig up old details about past employers. It almost feels as though you’re applying for an administrator role with the FBI, not a job in the corporate world. However, this tedious task holds a surprising benefit: it forces you to take a step back and reflect on your growth, accomplishments, and the value you bring to the table. Recently, as I applied for a new position, I had to reach out to previous employers for reference letters. It's always a bit awkward asking for these, wondering if the person you're reaching out to will remember you well enough to speak highly of your contributions. To my surprise, the last reference letter I received was filled with praise for my exceptional technical skills, multitasking abilities, and team player attitude. Being reminded of these strengths left me with a renewed sense of self-worth. Sometimes...

Last night, Lana did the sweetest thing. With her dad at work, it was just the two of us, and as usual, she lay next to me on the bed, on her back, dreaming. If you know Lana, you know how she loves to kick her little legs as though she's running in her dreams. It's such a natural thing for her, full of energy even when asleep. But then, something a bit unexpected happened. In the middle of her dream, maybe I wasn't visible to her, or maybe she sensed something unfamiliar. She woke up suddenly, still half-asleep, and let out a little cry. Without missing a beat, she immediately came to me, her body a little heavy on my chest as she curled up tightly. It was such a simple yet profound gesture, one that reminded me of the tiny, flea-covered puppy we first rescued — so small and unsure of the world, but with so much love to give. She’s not as little as she once was, and I could feel her weight on me more than ever. But it didn’t matter. In that moment, she was my baby again. I...

 I hate you, then I love you, A battle fought without a clue. In every glance, a storm ignites, A tangled dance of days and nights. Your presence haunts me, like a ghost, I crave your touch, but hate you most. How can it be, this pull, this fight? I run from you, then seek your light. My heart says one thing, mind says another, I push away, then pull you closer. Silent words that crash like waves, Conflicted thoughts that never save. I hate you for the way you know, The parts of me I never show. Yet in the silence, you still speak, A love so strong, it makes me weak. I hate you, then I love you, true, A war that rages between us two. Telepathic whispers in the dark, Fighting fire, but leaving a spark. And through this chaos, we remain, Caught in this love, this joy, this pain. For all the hate, the love still blooms, In the quiet spaces, where it looms.

So, this happened... and I was completely taken by surprise. On the very first day of my holiday, I received an email that truly made my day – actually, made my entire week! Turns out, I have an incredible job opportunity waiting for me, one that aligns perfectly with my passion for Customer Service Training. Yes, you read that right: I’m going to be a trainer ! I couldn’t have imagined a better way to kick off my break. The email was filled with such kind words, letting me know that they believe I’m not only talented but also the perfect match for what they’re looking for in a trainer. Yipee!! To say I’m excited would be an understatement. It feels like a huge step forward in my career, and I can’t wait to dive in and share my expertise with others in a whole new way. The only catch? It will take about two weeks to sort out all the formalities, but honestly, I don’t even mind. I’m just so thrilled to see where this new journey takes me. I’ve always been passionate about customer serv...

Here I am, on my first day away from my workplace, looking ahead with a mix of excitement and uncertainty. Leaving my job was something I had to do—no question about that. But now, as I take a step back, I find myself grappling with the challenge of finding my feet again. It’s one thing to make a change, but it’s another to navigate the unknown terrain that follows. Tolerance for this new phase is key, but sometimes, I can’t help but wonder if this was the right decision or if I was spiritually pushed out the door. So, what am I really looking for? Honestly, I think I want a life that’s less stressful, more meaningful, and definitely filled with friendlier faces. I want to protect my mental health, be more present for Lana, and carve out time to connect with my husband in ways I haven’t been able to before. For so long, work kept me distant from home life, and now it’s time to change that. I need to embrace home life, yes—but I also need to earn an income. It’s the balance I’ve been cr...

In recent days, my world has been shaken—Kathmandu has experienced six earthquakes in 30 days and it is not feasible that I travel at this point, but by a different kind of upheaval. Plans that had been set in motion, ones I had poured my energy into, have come to a grinding halt. And I find myself in the strange space between what could have been and what is. Sitting in my study, with the sound of an airplane overhead, I couldn't help but feel a heavy weight on my chest. It’s a stark contrast, really—here I am, grounded in South Africa, listening to the high-energy beats of “I’m So Excited” by the Pointer Sisters. It's supposed to lift my spirits, change the vibration of my day, but instead, I found myself in tears. Not because I wanted to cry, but because I couldn't change the course of the moment. It’s almost as though my excitement and plans—so carefully crafted—are now out of reach. My dreams feel distant, almost like they belong to a past version of myself. The vibrat...

You saw me in ways others couldn’t see, Understood the depths of who I was, The quiet parts, the wild, the broken, the free, Yet love from you came with no applause. Your eyes knew the spaces where my heart would hide, You touched my soul in whispers, soft and shy, But never once did your love dare collide With the truth that echoed in the sky. You knew my worth without ever saying it out loud, Held me in silence, but never in embrace, Your affection a secret, veiled like a cloud, Leaving me with nothing but longing’s trace. I was your understanding, your safe place to be, But in the light of day, I was never your own, You let me feel close, but not truly free, A love that was known but never fully shown. You understood, yes, but love was a mask, A delicate dance, always out of reach, You never let go, you never would ask To walk with me, beyond the sands of speech. So now I stand, with these quiet scars, Knowing you felt me, but never could stay, In your world of half-light, I was jus...

 Saying goodbye is one of life’s most challenging moments. Whether it’s leaving a company, ending a relationship, or parting ways with someone who’s been part of your daily life, the emotions that come with goodbyes can feel overwhelming. What’s interesting is how many people react to those emotions by shutting down, withdrawing, or even avoiding the person they’re leaving behind. The reality is, goodbye often brings up discomfort, fear, and even guilt that many don’t know how to process. When emotions like these rise to the surface, it’s not uncommon for people to avoid them entirely. They might feel like retreating into silence is the easiest way to escape the vulnerability of expressing their true feelings. After all, confronting emotions is rarely comfortable—especially when saying goodbye means acknowledging loss, change, and uncertainty. This fear of facing difficult emotions isn't a sign of malice. In many cases, it’s more about self-protection. Some people may not know how ...